I am so very exhausted at the moment, that I'm wide awake. I have no energy to be sleepy or do anything other than to stare into space--wincing at each heart beat--I feel my poor tortured joints and especially feet--not to mention my megrim-riddled head, at each fresh blood course. My thoughts are my sensations at the moment--and honestly, sadly (perhaps more accurately: pathetically) I am no so different from those people that cut themselves to feel a part of this world. I watched an interesting segment of one of my favorite shows the other night in which it was disclosed that people who come to believe that they will be perpetually isolated from their peers feel much less pain in response to applied physical pressure. I knew it to be true before an expert proved it--but it is somewhat comforting to know that in that instance, at least, I am "normal." and yet, the normalcy to which I've aspired (and woefully missed by distances unmeasurable) is NOT in this instance all THAT comforting! Ya think? Ah, well...you can't please everyone all the time, right?
Well, I had a 13 hour day, and tomorrow promises to bring even more torture. Alas, I shall spare everyone, including my future self, from reading a small novel!
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